Thursday, 19 April 2007

Celebrity Race - I don't think so...

from vitalbmx.com:

Dave Mirra Wins Celebrity Race!

The annual Toyota Grand Prix Celebrity race was held April 15th in Long Beach, CA. The race is full of Hollywood actors and professional athletes, and the winner for 2007 was none other than Dave Mirra! Apparently Dave can do anything he wants and come out on top. Congrats to Dave, and you can check out Toyota.com for more info. Crazy.

Results
1. Dave Mirra - NO Dave we said celebrities

2. Martina Navratilova - too busy eating pussy to win

3. Joshua Morrow - who?

4. Mike Skinner - in full factory Burberry uniform

5. RJ Romero - He owns the fucking company! he shoulda won by default

6. Bucky Lasek - you can't skate on gravel, he was destined to place low

7. Scott Kelley - KELLEY is wanted by the District of New Hampshire - New Hampshire Joint Fugitive Taskforce, based on arrest warrants issued by the U.S. Marshals Service and Coos County Sheriff's Office, NH for Unlawful Flight to Avoid Prosecution and Non-Custodial Kidnapping. - last seen in 7th place!

8. Emily Procter - won worst actress awards in 2001, 2002 & 2003 & her dad is a Doctor?? would that be as in the porn film "Dr Proctor - Anal Specialist" what a winner!

9. Kell Hu - & fuck you too unknown

10. John Salley - Ex NBA, aka 'the spider' I reckon had he not gone with the 280mm profile cranks choice he woulda placed higher...?

11. Aisha Tyler - Actress & avid 'home beer brewer' (piss head) was probably too fucked up on 'Old Thunderpussy Barleywine' to give a shit about some poxy BMX race

12. Jery Westlund - A former political consultant for the U.S.-controlled Bicycle Club casino has been indicted on charges of embezzling hundreds of thousands of dollars from the card club's political campaigns - how could he loose?

13. Kathryn Morris - shes a hottie, I have nothing derogatory to say about her

14. Robin Quivers - I bet he does being up against that 'legendary celeb' Dave Mirra!

15. Annamarie Dean - Toyota race car driver - should have come second right behind RJ??

16. George Lucas - not even the force could elevate George to place higher

17. Kendra Wilkinson - one of Hugh Hefners bunny's - stick to your inevitable porn career girl, you certainly have the rigged up face for it


So I can see it now, DM thinking 'I could beat those mofos for the gold medal!?' If it was that much of a bargain bin celeb deal then where where the following Z listers??:

  1. Vera Duckworth - go go you spiteful old fucker!

  2. Carol Thatcher - hot off her 'I'm a retard get me outta here!' win in 05, she would been hot for rockin' the 20" & leaving DM in her wake

  3. Gareth Gates - someone coulda pulled this looser fuckwit outta the dumpster he now resides in & put the goons career back on the track

  4. Joey Deacon - what a legend! well if he wasn't RIP he must have been down for the win, all he needed to do was have a chat with DM pre moto & he would drenched him in spit from all that whistling shit & DM's Oakley Razor Blades ((or whoever he's sponsored by this week)) would have been fully misted & he woulda put it over the first berm without a doubt...
Celebrities one & all then...

Tuesday, 17 April 2007

where's Wakey?!?

What with the perfect weather we seem to be having here of late, the bike sessions are becoming more frequent :-) So Saturday comes around & we find ourselves on the road to Chacombe once again...

Mikey, BK, Sboy, myself & Dopeammo maestro, Co put in an appearance this time round. We all had a great session in the sunshine, Milkey made 'bus driver' disasters & was trying foot jam foofs, Sunil was well back on form & riding the best I've seen him ride in years - go-go-dude!! BobbyK was inspired by watching a legendary old bike video of us from 10+ years ago & was out to prove that riding with craig'MuttDogg'walters back, circa 1994, was not the highlight of his flatland career & he's now set to blaze his way through 2007 - on one wheel. Co seemed to be enjoying himself & will hopefully rejoin the ranks this year & it would be great to see... watch this space ;-) After filming some 'comp runs' we were all shot & so retreated home, for some much needed shade & hydration, Same time next week then dooods.


Oh yeah, I did some more nose picks.

Monday, 9 April 2007

Blue skies for Easter

Well for the first time in ages, I rode twice in less than a week over the Easter BH-weekend. I'm really getting into this riding thing eh? Whilst some people think nothing of riding on a daily basis, it's a bit of a big deal for an 'old timer' like myself...

So after having a good little session on Thursday with Milkey, Rayo etc, I find myself hooking up with Sboy & BK for another nice little trip over to sunny Chacombe :-) I hope this is a sign of things to come this year as it's a bit of a rarity getting to ride with Sunil & Chack is also suitable for a little rock & roll, in a flatland stylee, which meant BK was also attending - all good!

The sun was out, we had some Slapshot on the tape deck & the old road trip feelings were resurfacing once again. It's great at this time of year, to think you have all that potential good weather & sessions to come, in the months to follow...

There were about 20 skaters 15 bladders & 35 BMXers already sessioning the ramps when we got there... thats a bit of an exageration actually, in reality, there was just one 10 year old girl & a toddler using the ramp as a slide & they soon scarpered as we rolled up :-) you gotta love having a park all to yourself eh?

Having ridden only 2 days earlier I was soon familiarising myself with Chacks curves & Sboy was soon in his element too, going for his tricks including those classic TM fast plants ;-)



Bob was squeaking his pinkies & looking forward to knee surgery



I made some more nose picks (I can do some other tricks - I think?)


& we snapped these photos which I feel really capture the good little session we had on a Saturday afternoon @ Chacombe ramps.

Friday, 6 April 2007

Paint is good

So, Alex got me thinking about how much I painted my Dirtbike(RIP), and I figured I'd share a few of it's moments. Unforortunately I can't find any of it when it had this awesome yellow/red fade on the go. The red was the same as the wheels(Renault capsicum red) and the yellow was the same as the yellow when it was new (Fiat broom yellow).


So, this one is the first paintjob I did on it, which involved riding into town, buying some paint, and taking it to the park to paint it. There was A LOT of overspray all over the tarmac, and we ran out of yellow so chaz was sent on a mission to get more while the wheels got done, or something. The gold and orange were 100% impulse buys, in a "hmm, nice orange, ooh, and gold, for the ladies" stylee.
Below we have the final, death colours. I think the bike was actually stripped down for this one! I really like the green, and the brown bits looked a lot darker in real life, almost black. The orange looked good in the can, but I'm not such a huge fan of how it turned out.




Parts-wise it's identical to my current bike, cept it's got T1 bars, a redneck light, and I had to cut the brakemounts off myself, and a different seat cover. And clamp. And a shadow conspiracy chain. Oh, and the front tyre's a dirtmonster, and the back is a tioga FS100. Same fat/skinny arrangement as now!

END

Wednesday, 4 April 2007

At long last, my bike!

Yea, so it's taken a while, but here goes






Frame- S&M Black Bike, 20.5, no brake mounts!
Fork- Dunno, some I found in the garage, poss old DK ones, not too heavy, soon to be replaced!
Bars- Attila Hot Bars, couple of inches chopped off each side
Grips- Oddy Gary Young. I think my mate Phil in Bristol took pity on me and my holy grips and gave me these
Stem- Attila toploader
Headset- Super**** campy thing
Seat- Primo Haemorrhoid
Post- Might be a Primo Rod, cut down pretty good
Clamp- One Ian gave me, custom super paint job. No finger marks in it, honest
Cranks- Solid. Awesome cranks, pissed me off A LOT recently because the spindle is 7/8, so it wouldn't work with my 22mm bb, but still amazing
BB- S&M 22mm
Sprocket- Metal 44t, many layers of paint
Pedals- Oddy Jim C. Best pedals I've ever had. Set number 2, much paint
Chain- Pretty stock looking thing, poss a KMC, the pins look like they've been punched. Contains links from more than one chain, in a Frankenstein stylee. Again, lots of paint
Front Tyre-Maxxis Holy Roller, fat bastard size
Back Tyre- Primo Wall, skinny bastard size(1.85)
Front Wheel- G-sport Homer on an oddy hazard lite. There's chrome under there somewhere
Back wheel- As above, with less layers of paint on the rim, but more flat spots
Freewheel- Shimano 16t baby!

Pretty standard, no high tec modifications, put a lovely cover on my seat, a bit of tape round the brake route hole in my seat tube to keep the crud out, will probably do the same to the gyro tab holes on the headtube when I get round to painting it. Also had to take the crank axle down to 22mm from 22.225, which was fun. It's still very snug going into the crank arms, but I guess time will tell if I need to shell out on new ones.

Future plans are to get new forks(hopefully coming from Ray, hopefully soon), a new front wheel, prob 36, and sort my gearing out down to 36/13, which'll probably mean a new back wheel too. Aaaaaand I need a halflink so I can suck my back end up a bit. Anywhere round here sell em? Or do I need to find an excuse for a trip to bicester?

Seeya out soon!

Wednesday, 28 March 2007

C.U.N.T?

Well ain't I the consummate BMXer? 2 sessions in as many weeks! I better slow down a bit. Arrangements were made to meet up at the park for 5pm-ish, so it was off into the sun again. I love the feeling I get when I'm heading out to ride & the weather is good...

Was great to catch up with Milkey as I've not seen him for a year or so (besides the brief 10 mins meet @ ROM last August) & so we had plenty of slagging off of the current state of BMX to get off our chests. Bob K put in an all too brief appearance & disappeared soon after, due to 'van issues' which I won't go into... I started to get the feel of the ply again after feeling a little bit sketch the last time down & made some nose picks, nothing new there then. Chris & Rayo turned up & got going, with Ray nailing every trick in his (very long) list, I saw him make a wall tap to manual out which was grand. Some of the local kids were heckling some loner guy on a unicycle who seemed to be rehearsing for the next 8-mile movie although I couldn't understand a fucking word that was streaming from his mouth...? hey-ho...

Well it was nice to get out while the sun was shining & the weather report for the rest of the week was bad, although today looks set to be a nice one again...

Well as the title suggests, perhaps see you next Tuesday?

Thursday, 15 March 2007

1st of the year...

14th of March & I got to dust off the bike to go & session Spice ball ramps for the first time this year. It's a nice feeling that we are coming out of the winter season & cutting work early is always a good thing ;-) So, I arranged to meet up with Ray as it was his birthday - congrats mate!

Nice to see some of the local boys sticking with it & all riding well, John's Footjam nosepicks were grand, totally like the old classic nosepick, boned out & real nice. Ray had the usual fire in his eyes & appeared to be in training for the upcoming 12 hour all nighter @ Epic this week end - go boy go! I was being reserved as ever, playing it safe & just trying to get back the feel of the park again, I really should ride more...

Today is 'sore back' day again! I'm not perturbed by it at all & can't wait to get out again though, so see you next week... weather permitting of course.